A few years ago, I saw some hilarious Valentines based on dictators. And I thought, I should totally do that with famous theologians! (Because, you know, that’s how my brain works.) So here you go!
Also, if you don’t present the Calvin valentine with a bouquet of tulips, you are missing out on a prime pun opportunity. Just sayin’.
Disclaimer: I have the greatest respect for all of these folks from church history and their contribution to the faith. I also think they might have found these amusing.
Any alternate caption ideas or ideas for theologians who aren’t featured?
The Monday Heretic 
Rollins: “My love for you is God”
Caputo: “Well if you insist”
Reblogged this on Social Memo.
Reblogged this on The Faculty Blog and commented:
This is lovely. Share these with those you love.
=(
I can’t figure it out. What is the pun with the Calvin valentine and the bouquet of tulips?
The “i” in “Tulip” stand for IRRESISTIBLE grace. The other four letters stand for other doctrines in Calvin’s theology. For more info, go to CR Ministries on Facebook.
T = Total Depravity
U = Unconditional Election
L = Limited Atonement
I = Irresistable Grace
P = Perseversence of the Saints
Pascal: My heart has its reasons of which reason knows nothing.
Francis Schaeffer: How Shall I Then Live without you?
John Wesley: My heart is strangely warmed … by your love.
I love this. I was trying to come up with one for him. Perfectly JW.
Love it!
Reblogged this on Revista Emergente and commented:
Hay que decirlo, a veces, solo estas tarjetas se pueden mandar.
You are my one and only. –Michael Servetus
Dietrich Bonhoeffer – Valentine I look forward to Life Together!
Good for a theological proposal, perhaps?
Saint Athanasius (296–373 AD):
“My word of love’s
here spelled for you—
in carnations.”
Cf. “On the Incarnation of the Word,” ca 360 AD.
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Saint Thomas Aquinas (1225–1274 AD):
“My Summa: Thee I Logically Adore.”
Cf. “Summa Theologica”
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Friederic Schleiermacher:
Though I’m shyer, I’m no liar.
‘Tis thee in faith, ’tis thee I need
in absolute dependency!
Cf. “The Christian Faith,” 1821
“Religion is a feeling of absolute dependency.”
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Karl Barth (1886–1968)
“I’m dogmatic: I’m your lover!
All is totally no, no other.”
Cf. “Church Dogmatics,”
and the 1930s essay “Nein!” (No!)
“God is ‘aliter totaliter,'” “wholly other.”
You are the Ground of my Being (well, next to God) -Tillich
Don’t cut me off …
– Peter Abelard
(Sorry, terribly poor taste)
“I declare that I love you! Isn’t that good news?!” N.T. Wright
C. H. Spurgeon: Defend my love for you? I would as soon defend a lion! Unchain it and it will defend itself.
“You are my ultimate concern.” -Paul Tillich
Letty Russell, Emilile Townes, Bev Harrison, and a host of other Feminist/Womanist Liberation Theologians: “Love frees! And love wins!”
St. Francis: “Words cannot describe my love for you.”
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Anne Lamott: Oh, I give up, just steal my heart already!
I know I’m late to the party, but this is just too fun.
Jonathan Edwards: You stir my affections.
Abraham Kuyper: Every square inch of my heart is yours.
Anselm: I have a love for you than which nothing greater can be conceived.
Francis Turretin: Do I love you? We affirm.